Cracker Toffee

17 08 2009


Have you ever had potluck anxiety? You know, when you are expected to bring something, but it just seems like everyone else’s dishes are going to be so much better than yours. So then you’re just completely paralyzed and can’t even think of anything to bring. Or maybe you’re just really uninspired, because everyone is bringing spinach dip and Cheeze-its. So then you volunteer to bring cups and plates, but you get sneered at. Either scenario is awful, and either one results in a hefty case of potluck anxiety. Well, this cracker toffee will cure any of your potluck woes. It will also make you very, very popular.

Unfortunately, it might also give you a serious trucker ass. It’s impossible to stop eating it. It’s also laughably easy to make, which can result in you thinking to yourself, “Self, I’m really craving something sweet. Maybe I’ll just whip up a batch of that easy cracker toffee stuff. I’ll only have a couple pieces.” Ha ha ha. You will eat the entire batch, and then you might make another batch and eat that one, too.

If you make this for a potluck, make sure you make it RIGHT BEFORE YOU GO so that it doesn’t sit around and give you time to think that maybe you should just have one, just one piece, to make sure it’s okay. You really can’t just eat one piece, I swear. If you make it for yourself, please do me a favor and cut the recipe in half, or even in a fourth and then make it in your toaster oven. I don’t want any of you dropping over from a heart attack from eating a full batch of this stuff. I also don’t want any of you e-mailing me and blaming me for your trucker ass.

Cracker Toffee (The interweb is FULL of recipes for this. I’m not sure where I got it originally.)

40 Saltines (matzoh crackers would also work really well here, but if you use those, add a dash of salt at some point)

1 cup of butter

1 cup of brown sugar

1/2 tsp vanilla

1 1/2 cups chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350

Line a baking sheet with aluminum foil and lay crackers out to cover the pan. You want the crackers’ sides to touch, like so:


Melt butter and brown sugar together in a saucepan and bring to a boil. Boil for 3 minutes, but be really really careful here because it can burn so easily! Stir it a lot and keep a close eyeball on it. After 3 minutes, remove from heat, add vanilla, and give it a good stir.

Now, work fairly quickly here (but don’t rush and burn yourself) and pour the caramel mixture over the saltines. Use a spatula or spoon or what have you to spread it around so it covers all the crackers. Like this:


Pop the tray into the oven and bake for about 15 minutes. Again, keep a close eyeball on it because you don’t want it to burn!

Remove from oven and sprinkle chocolate chips evenly on top. Let the whole shebang sit for a few minutes, then spread the chocolate around with a spatula. It will be nice and melty.


Not a great picture, but you get the idea, right?

Let the tray cool and the chocolate harden. I usually pop it in the fridge for a bit. When it’s cool, peel the foil from the back and break it into pieces.

I’ve got some ideas for modifications for this. I really want to try to make it with graham crackers. Doesn’t that sound delicious? I also think you could add some sliced almonds to the top to pretty it up, or some sea salt if you want to get fancy. I like to experiment with different types of chocolate, too. For the batch pictured here, I used a high-quality milk chocolate bar. I also tried it once with yogurt chips, but they didn’t melt very well. Still tasted good, though! I wonder if mixing white/dark chocolate into swirls might be delicious, and oh, if you used graham crackers, maybe you could dot the chocolate with mini-marshmallows. Yum!

Also, I always always halve the recipe. The Sandwich Hoss household members have NO self control around delicious food; and that includes the dogs, one of whom I had to rush to the emergency vet one night after he got into his dog food and ate and ate and ate. His entire torso was filled with food. I would easily do the same with this recipe, so a half batch is much better. However, if you halve the recipe, you have to shorten the cooking times a little and really make sure things don’t burn.




2 responses

18 08 2009

I love this recipe. I make it at Christmas. I dont dare any other time cause of that condition it causes, you know, Trucker’s Ass!

18 08 2009

Yes, this is definitely a treat that should be reserved for special occasions! Although, I have to admit to making tiny batches of it, say, on Friday nights. Friday nights are special occasions, right? hee hee

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